TRUST2   3'?m1f Monologue: Salvation, trust vs leap of faith

(enters carrying letter with official looking seal, sighs) Well,
here it is, my final divorce decree. It's not something I
wanted, but I got it anyway.

While I was on my knees asking God why he would allow such a
thing to happen to me, I got this sickening realization that
this divorce happened the day I decided to get married. (holds
up letter) Today was merely the formality. The only positive
thing that came out of this divorce was that I renewed my
relationship with God.

So, there I was on my knees before God asking why, hashing over
everything I knew about the marriage, then it occurred to me:
All my relationships are like this. My commitment to my marriage
was the same as my commitment to God. Neither relationship
lasted more than a few weeks. As a matter of fact, my marriage
lasted longer than my relationship with God.

What was I doing wrong? The answer was obvious, if I was honest
with myself: I married this... (points to letter) person before 
I really knew him and before he really knew me. I married him 
because of these mushy-gushy feelings I had for him and for no 
other reason. I was swept along by my emotions. I had no idea 
what to expect from him, his habits, his preferences, his likes 
and dislikes. The only reason I married him is because he made 
my heart go pitter pat. For all intents and purposes, I was 
marrying a stranger.

Then, it hit me like a ton of bricks: that's the way I entered
my relationship with God too. I had no idea what to expect from
Him, his habits, his preferences, His likes and dislikes. All I
knew about him was that when I sang songs to Him, my heart would
go pitter pat. No wonder my relationship with Him didn't last
either. For all intents and purposes, I made this spiritual
commitment to a stranger because he made my heart go pitter pat.
And when the emotions faded, so did my relationship.

I guess there was ONE blessing from my divorce: it made me renew 
and rebuild my relationship with God on a deeper level. By 
reading God's Word, I now know what to expect from him and what 
he expects from me. I know his preferences, His likes and 
dislikes. I know his track record. I know he's a man of His 
word. He's a man I can trust.

I guess that's the difference now. I recommitted my life to
Christ. But now it's based on something other than emotions.
It's based on trust. I can trust Him.

When I sing songs to Him, my heart still goes pitter pat. But
when the emotion fades, the relationship will still be healthy,
because it's deeper. It's based on TRUST. A relationship based
on anything less just won't last. (holds up letter) Take it from
someone who knows.

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