SAVIOR2  3'?m1f Monologue: cults, salvation by grace or works

(enters carrying a life preserver/ring buoy) I may not look like
it, but I'm a savior.

Now, before you pick up stones to stone me to death for
blasphemy, I want to make myself clear. I didn't say I was THE
savior. I said I was a savior. A savior is a person who rescues
someone from evil or danger. I'm a lifeguard. And lifeguards
save people all the time. After lifeguarding for a while, I have
three observations about real life that you may not get from
watching BAYWATCH on television:

First, when a lifeguard is running on the beach, he never runs
in slow motion.

Second, we saviors don't save people who are not in trouble.
Saving someone who doesn't need saving can get you a punch in
the nose. This is just common sense.

Third -- and this may seem a little redundant, but it's the most
important point -- we saviors save people who need saving. Now,
that may seem like a common sense thing to you. But to some
cult religions, this is a real revelation. Let me explain.

To some religions, when their lifeguard sees a person in trouble
he shouts, "Hey, you out there, I see you're in trouble. I have
a life preserver for you. (holds up buoy, points to it) Swim
into shore and get it!"

Now that sounds silly to you, doesn't it? What good is a savior
who tells drowning people to save themselves? If victims could
save themselves, they wouldn't be victims. Yet, that in essence
is what some cults teach. Their savior only saves people who
don't need saving.

To other religions, their lifeguard throws them a life preserver
and tells them that it's up to them to make it into shore on
their own. Have you ever seen a real lifeguard do that?

Some religions have a lifeguard that will only rescue you once.
If you ever get in trouble after your first rescue, you're

To other religions, their lifeguard has a quota. When he sees a
person in trouble, he shouts "I'm sorry, but I've already saved
144,000 victims and I'm over my quota, so you're on your own!
See ya!"

That sounds a little silly too, doesn't it? It's as ridiculous
as thinking that lifeguards run in slow motion. That's just not
the way lifeguards work.

We lifeguards have no quotas. We save everyone we can. The Bible
says that the same is true for THE savior. It says, "God is not
willing that ANY should perish."

Now, let me give you some advice about swimming and about life.
If you find that you've drifted out into deep water and you're
finding it difficult to stay afloat, we lifeguards will do
our best to save you. But I have learned that it's best to wait
until the victim gives up struggling to save himself before I
reach out to save him.

God is no different. If you give up struggling to save yourself
and admit that your best efforts have only gotten you into
deeper water, God will rescue you. But a word of caution: If it
seems that God is moving in slow motion, like a scene in
Baywatch, maybe he's waiting for you to stop struggling to save
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