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HOSPITAL 5'?m1f Monologue: suffering for God's purposes

(based on an allegedly true story)

 I'm basically a nice person. I really am. But when I get
sick.... well I'm not very pleasant to be around. No. Let me
rephrase that. When I'm sick, I'm IMPOSSIBLE to be around!

Like when I had kidney stones recently. The pain was so bad that
I ended up in the hospital while they decided whether or not to
operate. I was so obnoxious that even my best friends who
visited me once found excuses not to come back. And, of course,
God was not immune from my tirades.

At first I told Him, "God why are you letting this happen to
me?!." Then, when the pain grew worse, it was "God why are you
doing this to me?!" Finally, the pain was so bad that I pleaded
with Him. "God, if you're going to punish me, just kill me and
get it over with!"

By that time, of course, I had driven everybody else away, so I
had plenty of time to be alone with God and think about my
relationship with Him. And as the medication kicked in, I became
less and less frantic.

I said, "Alright, God, if you're not going to kill me, maybe you
want me to learn something from this. But, what? Just tell me
and get it over with!"

(pause) Nothing. No prophecy. No writing on the wall. No sky
writing. No clever words from my pastor. Not even any advice
from my mother. Nothing.

"Alright, Lord, if I'm not here to LEARN anything, why did you
put me here? Is there something you want me to DO here?"

(pause) Nothing. No prophecy. No writing on the wall. No sky
writing. No clever words from my pastor. Not even any advice
from my mother. Nothing.

By now even my own Mother was making excuses for staying away. I
finally figured that maybe God wasn't speaking because I wasn't
really listening. So, I apologized.

I said, (impatient) "Listen, Lord,...

(calm) "No, let me start over."

I said, "Lord, I'm sorry for blaming you and driving you away
the way I've driven everybody else away. I'm sure there must be
a lesson to be learned or some work to be done here, but I've
been so busy having my pity party that I've shut you out. Now
that I think about it, that was really dumb, since You are the
only one who loves me unconditionally."

Then, I cried for about an hour and fell asleep. When I woke up,
light was coming in through the window. It was morning. And for
the first time since I was admitted into the hospital, I really
looked around the room for a sign, a clue, a lesson or an
opportunity to serve.

That's when I looked at the empty bed next to mine. I was in a
semi-private room. And ever since I was admitted to the
hospital, the only thing I had thanked God for was that I had
the whole semi-private room to myself. Right now, having driven
all my friends and family away, a roommate wouldn't be all that
bad!

So, I prayed, "Lord, I know I don't deserve it, but I'd really
like someone to talk to in that next bed."

(tilts head, pause)

"No! Wait, Lord, on second thought, I've already been selfish
too long. If you want to give me a roommate, send someone I can
help in some way. Yeah, that's it, Lord, send someone who needs
help. Maybe a non-believer, somebody I can witness to."

Oh, oh! What did I just do? Did I just ask to witness to
somebody?! I've never witnessed to anybody in my life! What if 
God really uses me? What if he asks me to do something that 
makes me look stupid?! What if....

What am I thinking?! God loves me! He would never ask me to do
something and then not give me the power to do it!

"Okay, Lord, ANYTHING! ANYTHING you want. I'm done being
selfish. I want to help somebody!

Just a few minutes later, they wheeled in a girl who was about
to undergo surgery and she was absolutely petrified! She was
absolutely sure that she was going to die on the operating table
and when she got up to the pearly gates, Saint Peter was going
to turn her away because she didn't have enough good deeds to
make up for all the bad deeds she'd ever done.

So, I said, (smiles, looks up) "Thank you, Lord."

And she said "Why are you thanking the Lord?"

So, I explained to her everything that I just explained to you.
And that I had just prayed that he would put someone in that
empty bed who needed me. And boom! Here she is.

And she said, (mimics, excited) "You mean, God arranged all this
just for me?!"

Within a few minutes she put her trust in Jesus. And when they 
wheeled her out to surgery she had a smile on her face because 
she KNEW without a doubt that if she died on the operating 
table, that the God who went to all the trouble to arrange for 
us to meet would take her to Heaven for sure! I didn't have to 
quote any Bible verses or spout any theology... well, I did 
maybe a little. I told her that people don't get into heaven by 
doing good deeds, but by trusting in Jesus. But that was it! God 
did almost all the work by merely putting us together in the 
same room in the hospital!

Isn't God amazing?! He even used my illness to do his work. All
I had to do was relax and let it happen!
©2013 Bob Snook. Conditions for use:
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