GO!      4'2m1f Sarai, not Abram, gets the call to Go!

ABE --  (enters) Sarai, I'm home.

SAR --  (enters) Hello, Abram, honey. Did you have a nice day at 

ABE --  (they kiss) Yeah, I did. Sarai, did you know you're 
looking at the wealthiest man in Haran?

SAR --  Oh, Abram, how wonderful! Wait til I tell the girls at 
mah jongg!

ABE --  You, know, Sarai, the Lord has really blessed us here.

SAR --  Oh, speaking of the Lord, you wouldn't believe the crank 
call I got today.

ABE --  You got a crank call?

SAR --  Yes. This guy claimed to be the Lord himself. But he 
didn't fool me for a minute. I knew it was your nephew, Lot.

ABE --  What makes you think it was Lot?

SAR --  Well, he's always pulling stuff like that. He's such a 

ABE --  Stuff like what?

SAR --  He said, (imitating) "Leave your country and your people 
and your father's household and go to the land I will show you." 
That Lot, what a joker!

ABE --  Gee, Sarai, maybe it was the Lord after all?

SAR --  Oh, don't be silly. It was your nephew, alright.

ABE --  How do you know?

SAR --  Well, he wasn't content to just tell us to get out of 
town, he recited a poem.

ABE --  A poem? The Lord does that sometimes, so that I'll 
remember what he says. What did the poem say?

SAR --  Oh, something about blessing you and making you a great 
nation, then your name will be great and you will bless others, 
something like that.

ABE --  Gee, that sounds like something the Lord would say. What 
else did he say?

SAR --  Oh, come on, it was Lot. I don't know how he stopped 
himself from laughing out loud, but...

ABE --  What did he say?

SAR --  He said he would bless those who bless you and curse 
those who curse you. And here's the part that really made me 
laugh. He said, (imitating)"All the people's on earth will be 
blessed through you." Isn't that a stitch?"

ABE --  Sarai, I think that WAS the Lord talking to you.

SAR --  Naw. Honestly, Abram, I'm expecting your nephew to walk 
through that door any second and get a belly laugh out of it.

ABE --  Sarai, what did you tell him?

SAR --  (laughs) I told him he was a bum, and he should take a 

ABE --  Oh, dear.

LOT --  (enters) Hiya, Aunt Sarai and Uncle Abram. What's 
for dinner?

SAR --  We didn't invite you for dinner, you bum. Take a hike.

LOT --  Uncle Abram, are you gonna let her talk to me like that?

SAR --  I wish you'd stop making crank calls.

LOT --  What crank calls?

SAR --  You know what crank calls. This afternoon.

LOT --  Aunt Sarai, I was in Hebrew school all afternoon. I 
wasn't even near a phone.

SAR --  Then you put someone else up to it, you joker.

LOT --  No, I swear. What did the guy say?

SAR --  Oh, oh.

ABE --  It WAS the Lord.

LOT --  Who was the Lord? What's going on?

SAR --  I called the Lord a bum.

ABE --  And you told him to take a hike. It's supposed to be us 
taking a hike.

SAR --  We can't leave now.

ABE --  Why not?

SAR --  Tomorrow is my turn for mah jongg.

LOT --  Leave? Take a hike? What are you talking about?

ABE --  The Lord wants us to leave Haran.

LOT --  And go where?

ABE --  That's a good question. Go where?

SAR --  He didn't say. He just said GO. But we can't leave. No 

ABE --  Why not?

SAR --  Because I already made the chopped chicken liver and 
bagels for tomorrow, that's why.

ABE --  But Sarai, the Lord said...

SAR --  I don't care. HE's not the one who has to pack up all 
this stuff. If he wants us to leave, let him pack our stuff.

ABE --  Sarai, be reasonable.

SAR --  Reasonable? What's so reasonable about leaving Haran and 
not knowing where you're going?

ABE --  We were heading for Canaan when my father had us settle 
here in Haran. Maybe we should continue in that direction.

LOT --  Yeah, Aunt Sarai, Canaan will be fun. I'll help you 
pack. (sniffs) Mmmmm. Did you say bagels and chopped chicken 
liver? (exits)

SAR --  (crosses to exit) Don't you go eating that. It's for 
mah jongg. We're having baked chicken. (to Abram) What's in Canaan, 

ABE --  (crosses to Sar) I don't know, maybe that's where the 
Lord wants to make me into a great nation.

SAR --  Ha! That's a laugh. How is he going to make you a great 
nation when we don't have any children? Next thing you'll be 
telling me is that the Lord wants to make me pregnant after all 
these years. (exits)

ABE --  It could happen. (exits)

2013 Bob Snook. Conditions for use:
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