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TROUBLE  5'?m6f Salvation, count the cost, discipleship

LIZ -- (enters with Bible open, staring off into space)

AID -- (follows) Elizabeth? Elizabeth?

LIZ -- (stops, turns) Yes?

AID -- When did you become a Christian?

LIZ -- A Christian?

AID -- Yes, if you had told me before you took your test...

LIZ -- ...Do I know you?

AID -- No. Not really. I'm the teachers aid for your Mathematics
professor.

LIZ -- And how do you know me?

AID -- The professor just called and told me to track you down
and let you know.

LIZ -- Know what?

AID -- You got an "A" in your last test.

LIZ -- I did?!

AID -- Yes, of course!

LIZ -- I don't understand the concepts that well. I thought sure
I failed that test.

AID -- (exiting) It's okay now. You're a Christian!

LIZ -- What does that have to do with.... Well, isn't that
interesting?!

MSG -- (enters carrying folded note, shouting) Message for
Elizabeth Johnson. Message for Elizabeth Johnson.

LIZ -- (turns) I'm Elizabeth Johnson.

MSG -- (offers message) Message for you from the Finance
Committee.

LIZ -- (takes message) What Finance Committee?!

MSG -- From the college.

LIZ -- I know. But, they sent a message by way of a courier?!

MSG -- Apparently, congratulations are in order.

LIZ -- For What?! (reads) "Your application for a student loan
has been refused." (to Msg) I don't see why congratulations are
in order.

MSG -- Read the rest of the letter. (points, to paper, exits
backward) The committee found out that you made a decision for
Jesus today.

LIZ -- (reads) "You have been awarded a full scholarship for the
remainder of your stay at the college." (to Msg) This is because
you think I'm a Christian?! (looks both ways) Where did she go?

COP -- (enters) Oh, there you are. I've been looking all over
for you.

LIZ -- You were looking for me?

COP -- Yes.

LIZ -- Why? Oh! Don't tell me I got another parking ticket!
Don't tell me you towed away my car!

COP -- Not at all.

LIZ -- Listen, I've been meaning to pay those previous parking
tickets. But my cash flow has been....

COP -- Don't worry about cash flow. The police chief cancelled
all your outstanding tickets and warrants.

LIZ -- He what?!

COP -- The police chief cancelled all your...

LIZ -- ...I heard you. Why would he do that?! I've never met the
Chief of Police!

COP -- (exiting) He found out that you made a commitment to
Jesus. Congratulations.

LIZ -- What on earth is going on here?! I never told anybody...

BNK -- (enters carrying credit card) Elizabeth Johnson?

LIZ -- (turns) Yes?

BNK -- Listen, I hate to bother you with business on such an
important day.

LIZ -- I know you. You're the teller from the bank, aren't you?

BNK -- Yes. I....

LIZ -- If this is about my overdraft, I'm sorry.

BNK -- There's no need to be sorry. The branch manager has
decided to issue you an unlimited line of credit that will
automatically cover any past or future overdrafts. He also
issued you a Visa Gold Card to help you cut down on your check
writing. (offers card)

LIZ -- (takes card) Don't tell me. The branch manager found out
that I made a commitment to Jesus.

BNK -- (exiting) Yes! Congratulations! Your troubles are over!

LIZ -- (examines card) This is absolutely amazing!

DOC -- (enters) Elizabeth! I'm glad I found you! The x-rays and
biopsy results came back!

LIZ -- I'm on a roll. I'll bet the cyst was benign.

DOC -- Better than that. The cyst we found has completely
disappeared from your x-rays and the blood tests all came back
negative. You're completely cured! Congratulations! (turns)

LIZ -- Wait a minute.

DOC -- (turns) Yes?

LIZ -- This miraculous cure wouldn't just happen to have
something to do with the fact that I made a commitment to Jesus
today, would it?

DOC -- Well, of course!

LIZ -- What if I told you that I... I didn't really make a
commitment to Jesus yet. What if I told you I was merely
THINKING about committing my life to Jesus?

DOC -- Oh. (pauses) Well... that explains everything.

LIZ -- What do you mean?

DOC -- I mean, I couldn't understand how I suddenly became a
doctor. I've never been a doctor before today.

LIZ -- You what?

DOC -- That shouldn't be news to you. I'm your best friend. I
live two houses away from you. Surely, if anyone knows I'm not a
doctor, it would be you.

LIZ -- Amy?!

DOC -- I'm not even good at biology! How could I become a
doctor?!

LIZ -- What's going on here?!

DOC -- Well, as near as I can tell, you and I are in church and
you are considering making a commitment to Jesus.

LIZ -- You mean, I'm day-dreaming all of this?

DOC -- Yes, and it's not very realistic.

LIZ -- You're right. There's no way you could ever survive
medical school!

DOC -- That's not what I mean. I mean, becoming a Christian
doesn't mean that all of your problems are solved and everything
is just rosey.

LIZ -- It doesn't?

DOC -- Of course not. You've got a Bible right there. Look up
John 16:33. (exits quietly)

LIZ -- (pages) John 16:33 "In this world you will have trouble."
Oh. Well, Amy, I guess I had the wrong idea of what it was like
to be a Christian. (looks around) Where did she go? (exiting) I
guess my day-dream is over. I guess I should take a closer look
at what I can realistically expect as a Christian.

2013 Bob Snook. Conditions for use:
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