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REBUKE   4'1m3f Discipleship: rebuke of a backslider

(scene: a courtroom or podium, all characters wear pajamas,
robes, slippers)

DAD -- (enters yawning, scratching self, crosses to podium,
pounds gavel) This court will come to order. Bring in the
prisoner.

SIS -- (enters bound by chains, dragging more chains noisily)
What's going on here, Daddy? Somebody bound me in chains!

DAD -- When we're in court, the defendant will address me as
"Your Honor".

SIS -- Defendant?! I'm a defendant?! What did I do?!

DAD -- Is the prosecutor ready to proceed?

MOM -- (enters yawning) Yes, your honor.

SIS -- Mother is a prosecutor?! She didn't even go to law
school!

DAD -- (pounds gavel) Silence in the court. Don't speak unless
spoken to!

SIS -- Okay, Daddy.

DAD -- (pounds gavel)

SIS -- Yes, Your Honor.

DAD -- Has defense counsel had sufficient time to prepare her
case?

KID -- (enters yawning) We're ready to proceed, Your Honor.

SIS -- She's my defense attorney? She's just a kid! What does
she know about defending anybody?!

DAD -- (pounds gavel) Silence in the court. Don't speak unless
spoken to!

SIS -- Yes, Your Honor.

DAD -- Read the charges.

SIS -- Yes, by all means, read the charges. What exactly is it
that I was supposed to have done?

DAD -- (pounds gavel)

SIS -- Sorry. I'll be quiet.

MOM -- (reads) The defendant is charged with an error of
omission. The Bible says that anyone who knows the good he ought 
to do and doesn't do it sins. The defendant is accused of 
remaining silent while her best friend became unequally yoked 
with an unbeliever.

SIS -- How did YOU know about that? I never told anyone about
that!

DAD -- (pounds gavel)

SIS -- Well, shouldn't my defense counsel object or something?

KID -- Oh. I object.

DAD -- On what grounds?

KID -- I don't know. She just wanted me to object.

SIS -- Oh, brother! If that's what I'm getting for a defense,
I'm toast!

DAD -- (pounds gavel) Your defense counsel was assigned by the
court and is adequate for your defense. Would you like to appeal
my ruling?

SIS -- Well, no. But how did Mom know about my... well, you
know.

MOM -- It is a well known fact that mothers have eyes in the
back of their heads.

SIS -- Oh.

DAD -- How does the defendant plead?

SIS -- Guilty, I suppose.

DAD -- Would the defendant like to elocute?

KID -- What is elocute? Is that like passing gas?

MOM -- It means that your sister gets to come clean about her
sin of omission.

KID -- Oh. Sure. My client would like to elocute.

SIS -- I would not! What do you know about it, anyway! You're
not even a lawyer!

DAD -- (pounds gavel) Elocute, or you'll be cleaning your
sisters bedroom every day for a month.

SIS -- That's cruel and unusual punishment, Your Honor!

DAD -- (pounds gavel)

SIS -- Alright. I'll do it. I'll say what I did... or didn't do. 
I saw my friend Allysa hanging around a non-Christian boy and I 
didn't rebuke her for becoming unequally yoked. I didn't want to 
interfere, you know? She's my best friend. I thought she'd see 
that the guy was a creep and drop him like a hot potato. But she 
didn't. So, he got Allysa to try some things.

KID -- What kind of things?

SIS -- You're supposed to be defending me, not prying into the
personal life of my friend!

DAD -- (pounds gavel)

SIS -- I'm sorry. Suffice it to say, the creep... I mean the
non-Christian boy got her to try things that Christians wouldn't
be proud of. But I still didn't say anything. I was too
embarrassed. I didn't know what to say. But she's getting in
deeper. And she's my best friend. I've got to tell her!

KID -- Your Honor, my client would like to enter into a plea
bargain.

DAD -- Counselor?

MOM -- What did defense counsel have in mind?

KID -- If the defendant will do her Christian duty and confront
the perpetrator with her offenses, I propose that all charges
against my client be dropped.

DAD -- Counselor?

MOM -- We have a bargain.

KID -- Good! Let's adjourn the court and go back to sleep. It's
almost time for the alarm to go off.

DAD -- This court is adjourned. (pounds gavel)

MOM & DAD -- (exiting) Good night, kids.

SIS -- You mean, I'm still asleep? I'm dreaming all of this?

KID -- (exiting) Sometimes you need a little help with the tough
decisions.

SIS -- (follows) I'm sure glad it was a dream. Cleaning your
room would be a nightmare.

2013 Bob Snook. Conditions for use:
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