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MUSIC    4'2m0f Puppets, praise, worship, music: a gift from God

ERNIE - (enters, looks down) Bert, can I see you up here a
minute?

BERT -- (enters) Sure, Ernie, what's on your mind?

ERNIE - Listen, Bert, I hate to be picky, but I noticed that you
always come late to church service every Sunday.

BERT -- Yeah, Ernie, that's so I can skip the singing.

ERNIE - So, you can skip the singing? You mean you WANT to skip
the singing?

BERT -- Sure, Ernie. See, I don't sing so good.

ERNIE - You don't sing so WELL.

BERT -- No. And what's the big deal anyway? It's just singing.
It's not like I miss anything.

ERNIE - (looks to audience, looks to Bert, looks to audience)

BERT -- What.

ERNIE - You're only missing half of the blessings you could be
getting in church.

BERT -- What do you mean, Ernie?

ERNIE - When they take the offering, do you give money?

BERT -- Well, of course I do.

ERNIE - Why?

BERT -- Why?

ERNIE - Yeah, why do you give some of your money to God?

BERT -- Well, I guess there's two reasons. First, it reminds me
that my money is a gift from God. Second, the Lord promises to
bless me if I will give some of his money back to him.

ERNIE - Did you know that music is exactly like money?

BERT -- No it isn't. You can't put music in your wallet.

ERNIE - (nose to nose) Very funny.

BERT -- Alright, Ernie, why is music exactly like money?

ERNIE - The Lord gave us music as a gift. And just like money,
he expects us to give some of it back to him in church.

BERT -- No kidding.

ERNIE - No kidding. And if you give some of his music back to
the Lord on Sunday he'll bless you.

BERT -- You don't understand, Ernie. My voice sounds like a
squeaky door hinge. The Lord doesn't want to hear me sing.

ERNIE - Let's suppose you were as poor as church mouse and you
could only afford to give one penny when they took the offering.
Do you think the Lord would like it if you gave him only a
penny?

BERT -- Well, of course. The Lord doesn't care how much you
give. The important thing is giving.

ERNIE - And no matter how bad your voice is, the Lord still
wants you to return some of your gift of music to him.

BERT -- Well, I don't know. My voice isn't much of a gift to
give the Lord.

ERNIE - Do you remember the story of Palm Sunday, when the
Pharisees told Jesus to stop the people from singing (sings)
Hosanna! Hosanna! Hosanna in the highest!

BERT -- Yeah, I remember that story, Ernie. But what does that
have to do with my lousy voice?

ERNIE - Jesus told the Pharisees that if the people stopped
singing, the rocks would start singing. How well do you suppose
the rocks would sing?

BERT -- Oh, well, when you put it like that, Ernie, I guess I
could sing better than a bunch of rocks.

ERNIE - We'll see about that. (looks down, shout) Can we have
some rocks up here please?

(round headed puppets and puppets with rock-like hats show the
tops of their heads, bob up and down with the beat of the music)

(Music cue:
"Ain't gonna let no rock out-praise me"
1995 Integrity's Praise! Music,
by David Baroni & Kevin Singleto
Note: if this music is unavailable, any upbeat song will do)

ERNIE - (sings)
Ain't gonna let no rock out-praise me,
Ain't gonna let it sing in my place.
Ain't gonna let no rock out-praise me,
Ain't gonna let it sing in my place.


BERT -- (sings)
Ain't gonna let no rock out-praise me,
Ain't gonna let it sing in my place.
Ain't gonna let no rock out-praise me,
Ain't gonna let it sing in my place.

BOTH -- (sing)
I will make a joyful noise,
I will sing a joyful song,
That is pleasing to the ear of the LOrd
I will make a joyful noise,
I will sing a joyful song,
That is pleasing to the ear of the LOrd

Ain't gonna let no rock out-praise me,
Ain't gonna let it sing in my place.
Ain't gonna let no rock out-praise me,
Ain't gonna let it sing in my place.

ALL -- (heads of rocks pop up into full view and sing)
I will make a joyful noise,
I will sing a joyful song,
That is pleasing to the ear of the LOrd
I will make a joyful noise,
I will sing a joyful song,
That is pleasing to the ear of the LOrd
Ain't gonna let no rock!

(rocks exit immediately after song)
(choir and band promo)

BERT -- Well, I guess I'll start coming to church in time for
the singing, Ernie.

ERNIE - I have an even better idea.

BERT -- What do you mean?

ERNIE - You could do more than just sing in church. You could
sing in the choir or play an instrument in the band.

BERT -- Do you really think they'd let me do that, Ernie?

ERNIE - Sure. You just have to promise to sing or play from your
heart right do God, like you just did.

BERT -- Well, I think I'll go sign up then. (turns)

ERNIE - Watch out for that....

BERT -- Woooo! (falls out of sight) Oooof!

ERNIE - ...rock.... (exits)

BERT -- (peeks head up, sings in pain) ...Aaaaaah!

ERNIE - (exiting) Save it for the choir, Bert.

BERT -- (exiting) Oh, sure, Ernie. Whatever you say.


2013 Bob Snook. Conditions for use:
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Pay no royalties, even if you make money from performances.
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