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LOVE     3'1m1f How do I love thee: eros, phileo, or agape?

(both enter hand in hand, cross slowly)

SHE -- Thank you for a wonderful evening. I had a wonderful 
time.

HE --- I had a nice time too. (stops, turns She to him) You 
really are a very lovely girl. (puckers, leans in to kiss, 
nearly falls when She balks)

SHE -- (backs away, turns audience) Do you love me?

HE --- Oh, yes, I love you. Of course I love you. (turns She to 
him, puckers, leans in to kiss, nearly falls when She balks)

SHE -- (backs away, turns audience) What kind of love do you 
have for me?

HE --- Excuse me?

SHE -- What kind of love do you have for me?

HE --- What do you mean, what kind of love do I have for you?

SHE -- You said you loved me.

HE --- I do.

SHE -- So what kind of love do you have for me?

HE --- I don't understand the question.

SHE -- The Greek language has three different words for love. 
Which of them best describes your love for me?

HE --- I'm not very good at fill-in-the-blank. Can we make this 
a multiple choice test?

SHE -- Oh, sure. There's PHILEO, EROS, and AGAPE'.

HE --- Is that so?

SHE -- Yes. So, how do you love me?

HE --- PHILEO?

SHE -- So, you love me like a brother loves his sister? (turns 
away)

HE --- (persues) Well, not exactly. Well, I love you. Well.... 
What were the other two choices?

SHE -- EROS and AGAPE'.

HE --- EROS? Yes, that's it. (turns She to him, puckers) EROS.

SHE -- You lust after me only for my sexual appeal? (turns away)

HE --- Yes. No. Well....

SHE -- Well, do you or don't you?

HE --- What was the other one? The last one?

SHE -- AGAPE'.

HE --- AGAPE', yeah that's it. I love you with AGAPE love.

SHE -- You do?

HE --- Yes, of course I do.

SHE -- (leaning in for a kiss) Oh, you are such a brave boy. 
(nearly falls when He balks)

HE --- (leans in, the pull away, turns away) Brave? Did you say 
brave?

SHE -- Yes. Agape love is the best love of all. (leans in for a 
kiss, nearly falls when He balks)

HE --- Can we please clarify our terms?

SHE -- Excuse me?

HE --- I thought you said that AGAPE' was a kind of love.

SHE -- I did.

HE --- What does love have to do with being brave?

SHE -- Oh. AGAPE' is the kind of love that Jesus demonstrated in 
the Bible. 

HE --- Well, now that you mention it, I suppose I do love you 
like that. "As I have loved you, so you must love one another." 
(leans in for a kiss)

SHE -- So, you would die for me, like Jesus did? (leans in for a 
kiss, nearly falls when He balks))

HE --- (turns to exit, looks at watch) Oh, look what time it is!

SHE -- Where are you going.

HE --- (exiting backward, points over shoulder to exit) I have 
to go brush up on my Greek. Good night.

SHE -- (shrugs, exiting opposite, backward) Good night.

2013 Bob Snook. Conditions for use:
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