GREEK    3'2m0f Greek and Hebrew are difficult to understand

PROF --- (with reading glasses and rumpled sport coat with elbow 
patches, enters reading Bible, stands DC)

LEROY -- (hick, enters, crosses to DC) Howdy, professor. What ya 
doin', readin'?

PROF --- Nothing slips by you, does it, Leroy?

LEROY -- What are ya readin'?

PROF --- The Bible.

LEROY -- (looks over Prof's shoulder) Aw, professor, you're just 
funnin' me. That ain't the Bible.

PROF --- Yes, it IS the Bible, Leroy. Don't you have a class
or something?

LEROY -- I seen the Bible lots of times. It don't look like
that, with all them squiggles.

PROF --- This is the original old Testament Hebrew text. 

LEROY -- You mean, this is the way they wrote in the old days?

PROF --- Yes.

LEROY -- How come they didn't use real letters?

PROF --- These ARE real letters, Leroy. The Hebrews who wrote
the old Testament had their own letters. See, this one
is called Dalet.

LEROY -- What's this one? (points) 

PROF --- He.

LEROY -- Who?

PROF --- He.

LEROY -- I know it's HE, but who is he?

PROF --- HE is the H sound. For instance, it's the first letter
in the word HEBREW.

LEROY -- HE. Oh, HE! Why didn't you say so? And what's this one?

PROF --- Nun.

LEROY -- You mean zero.

PROF --- No, Nun. 

LEROY -- That's what I said. Zero. Nothin'.

PROF --- Leroy, it's not a number.

LEROY -- Oh, Nun!

PROF --- That's right, Nun!

LEROY -- I didn't think they had any nuns in the old Testament.

PROF --- Of course, they did. (points) Here's one here, here, 
here and here. They're all over the old Testament.

LEROY -- Did they have any convents?

PROF --- Leroy, NUN is not a ....

LEROY -- What's this cute li'l one, here?


LEROY -- Oh, I know all about SIN.

PROF --- I'm sure you do.

LEROY -- Yup. If there was more NUNs in the old Testament,
there woulda been a lot less SINs.

PROF --- Let's try the New Testament. Greek is a but easier to
learn than Hebrew.

LEROY -- It's all Greek to me, Perfessor.

PROF --- (Pauses, forces a smile) This is RHO. (points)


PROF --- Yes, Rho.

LEROY -- So, this page must be about the boat on the Sea of

PROF --- Not THAT row, I mean... Nevermind. 

LEROY -- What's this cute little one here. (points)

LEROY -- MU? By golly, I think my cat speaks Greek. MU!

PROF --- This is PI.


PROF --- PI.

LEROY -- Apple or Cherrie.

PROF --- Apple or cherrie. That's very funny. (not smiling)

LEROY -- And this one here. (points) What's this one?

PROF --- Nu. That's NU.

LEROY -- No, it ain't.

PROF --- Yes, it is, Leroy. It's NU.

LEROY -- No, it ain't so NU, perfessor. I seen it lotsa times 
before. It's in my Bible too. It's a V.

PROF --- Leroy, that's not a's a... (looks at watch, 
heads toward exit) Well, look at the time. I have a lecture 
(mumbles) tomorrow afternoon. 

LEROY -- (heads toward opposite exit) Well, thanks for the Greek 
and Hebrew lesson, perfessor. It was as easy as PI. Ha, ha. 

PROF --- Apple or cherrie. (exits)

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