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EVIDENCE 6'?m4f Salvation, works, evidence of saving faith

(scene: small conference table, 4 chairs)

COP -- (enters dragging Liz by elbow, points to chair) Sit.

LIZ -- (enters handcuffed, sits) You still haven't told me what 
I've being accused of.

COP -- Don't play coy with me. You know the new federal statute.

LIZ -- Actually, I have no idea what you're talking about.

MEG -- (enters briskly, carrying briefcase) Officer, you should 
know better than to interrogate my client before she has legal 
counsel present. Anything she has said up to this moment is not 
admissible as evidence in court. (sits, to Liz) You didn't admit 
to anything, did you?

LIZ -- No, I have no idea...

MEG -- ...good. Officer, from here on, you will address all 
questions to me.

COP -- You lawyers make me sick.

LIZ -- Can someone please tell me what I'm doing here?

MEG -- That's a good question. May I see the arrest warrant?

COP -- (pulls warrant from pocket, hands it to Meg) Knock 
yourself out.

MEG -- (reading) Officer, I'd like to consult with my client.

COP -- Be my guest.

MEG -- (looks up from warrant) Alone. 

COP -- (exiting) Alright, alright.

LIZ -- What am I being accused of?

MEG -- Violation of the new federal hate crimes act.

LIZ -- Hate crimes?! I don't hate anybody!

MEG -- (scanning warrant) Under the new hate crimes act, it's a 
crime to espouse any absolute standard of right and wrong 
behavior. The leftists are using the popularity of hate crimes 
laws to outlaw Christianity.

LIZ -- They can't do that!

MEG -- They can and they did. The president just signed the new 
hate crimes bill this morning and you are apparently the first 
person to be arrested in this city. Do you have any idea of why 
they chose you?

LIZ -- Yes. I... I didn't understand the reason for it at the 
time, but this morning on the sidewalk in front of my office 
building, a TV news crew asked a bunch of us if we were 
Christians. I was kind of proud of myself that I was the only 
one of the five of us who admitted to going to church.

MEG -- Well, according to the new law, it's not illegal to go to 
church, only to be a Christian. Whatever you do, don't admit to 
anything. Let me do the talking.

LIZ -- (sees Cop coming) What's he doing with my purse?

MEG -- Do you have a warrant to search my client's purse, 
officer?

COP -- (enters digging through purse) Read the warrant, 
counselor. It says we have the right to search her personal 
possessions for evidence relating to the charge. (pulls out 
appointment book) Yes, here we are.

LIZ -- Can he do that?

MEG -- (taps warrant) Apparently so. What is that? (points to 
appointment book)

COP -- (drops purse on table, pages through appointment book)

LIZ -- My appointment book.

MEG -- My client is not admitting that that is her appointment 
book, only that it resembles her appointment book.

COP -- (page) Uh huh. (page) Uh huh.(page) Uh huh. (page) Uh huh.

MEG -- Did you find something?

COP -- Uh uh.

MEG -- Good. My client is completely innocent.

COP -- (paging) Not a single entry in this appointment book has 
anything to do with church or anything Christian. I thought you 
said you were a Christian. Don't you spend ANY time doing church 
work?

LIZ -- Well, I...

MEG -- My client never admitted to being a Christian. She only 
admitted to going to church. It's still not a crime in this 
country to go to church.

COP -- (pulls checkbook from purse, pages) Well, if there's 
proof that she's a Christian, it'll be in here?

MEG -- What's that?

LIZ -- My checkbook.

MEG -- My client is not admitting that that is her checkbook, 
only that it resembles her checkbook.

COP -- (points) And does this RESEMBLE her name stamped in gold 
on the cover? (pages through check register)

MEG -- My client is making no admissions of anything.

COP -- (page) Uh huh. (page) Uh huh.(page) Uh huh. (page) Uh huh.

MEG -- Did you find something?

COP -- Uh uh.

MEG -- Good. I told you, my client is completely innocent.

COP -- (paging) Not a single entry in her check register either. 
I thought you said you were a Christian, lady. Don't you give 
any money to the church or to Christian causes?

LIZ -- I....

MEG -- (holds up hand to prevent Liz from speaking) The word 
Christian means different things to different people. Going to 
church doesn't make her a Christian anymore than going to a 
garage makes her a car.

COP -- (tossing checkbook into purse) Well, I'll be... Not a 
single bit of evidence linking this woman with being a 
Christian. 

MEG -- Then, I think it would be appropriate to set my client 
free. 

COP -- (unlocks Liz's cuffs) You're right, there, counselor. 
You're free to go. (exits)

LIZ -- (rubbing wrists) I don't know how to thank you.

MEG -- (exiting) Don't thank me. I'll send you a bill. 

LIZ -- (begins to stand, clutches at heart, slumps in chair) 
Gasp! (dies)

(Optional light cue: dim to near dark, baby spot on Liz)

AMY -- (enters hurriedly wearing white tunic) Oh, dear, I am 
terribly sorry. There's been a dreadful mistake!

LIZ -- (stands) Mistake? (looks around) Where am I?

AMY -- You're just outside of Heaven.

LIZ -- You mean, I'm... dead?

AMY -- Yes, you're quite dead. You died of a heart attack. And 
I'm glad we caught you in time.

LIZ -- In time? In time for what?

AMY -- One of the other angels saw you on television. She 
brought you up to Heaven because she thought you were a 
Christian because you said you went to church.

LIZ -- But I AM a Christian.

AMY -- No, I'm sorry, we already covered that.

LIZ -- Covered what?

AMY -- Just before you died, it was clear that there was no 
evidence to convict you of being a Christian.

LIZ -- But I AM a Christian. I told you that.

AMY -- No, I'm sorry. I really am. But if there is no evidence 
of your faith on earth, there's no evidence in Heaven either. 
(exiting backward) I'm sorry. You're free to go.

LIZ -- Free to go? Go where? I have nowhere else to go... 
(backing to opposite exit) Oh, no. Oh, no. OH, NO!

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