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DATING   8'2m2f Sex and dating

AMY -- (enters, sits in one of two side-by-side chairs facing
audience, opens one of her school books begins reading)

BOB -- (enters reading a book, sits next to Amy without noticing
who is in the next seat)

(as the Angels get acquainted behind them, Bob and Amy discover
each other, looking away from each other when their gaze is
discovered)

GIRL - (experienced angel, enters) Oh, no, there she goes again.
I can't leave her alone for a minute. (crosses arms, paces floor
upstage of Bob and Amy) What am I going to do with her?

BOY -- (inexperienced angel, enters, looks around at his new
surroundings, circles chairs and Girl, circles Girl admiringly)

GIRL - What are you staring at?

BOY -- You can see me?

GIRL - Of course I can see you. And I do not appreciate your
eye-balling me like that.

BOY -- (crosses to other side of Girl) You can see me?

GIRL - Of course I can see you. What, are you new at this?

BOY -- New at what?

GIRL - You are. You're as green as grass.

BOY -- (waves hand in front of Girl's face) So, you CAN see me?

GIRL - (turns away) Oh, brother, (points) these kids don't stand
a chance.

BOY -- (follows) Wait a minute. I'm a guardian angel and the
only way that you could possibly see me is if you are an angel
too. So, you're a guardian angel too?

GIRL - (turns) Oh, brilliant. What gave you the first clue?

BOY -- (stops) Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know there were any girl
angels. I thought there were only boy angels. (circles Girl,
staring) I mean, there were no girl angels in my class at the
academy.

GIRL - (impatient) Look, the reason they sent us here to
watch over these kids is because (points) Amy wants to try
dating again.

BOY -- Again?

GIRL - Yes, again, like she didn't learn her lesson the first
time.

BOY -- They tell me Bobby (points) has dated before, but we're
both new, you know, spiritually. This is may first assignment.

GIRL - I would have never guessed.

BOY -- Well, how tough could it be, anyway? I mean, it's just a
date. He asks her out. She says yes. They have a good time...

GIRL - ...if it were only that simple.

BOY -- What do you mean?

GIRL - In a word: HORMONES.

BOY -- Hormones?

GIRL - I tried to talk her out of if but...

AMY -- Hi, Bobby.

BOB -- Hi, Amy.

GIRL - Look at her. She even made the first move. (sings) I
think I see another disaster coming.

BOY -- I'm afraid I have no idea what you're talking about.

GIRL - (shouts in Amy's ear) Amy, listen to me. This is a boy.
Boys have hormones.

BOY -- I fail to see how hormones have anything to do with...

GIRL - ...Quiet! She thinking. She's actually thinking this
time.

BOB -- I see you're studying Mr Rothacker's history homework.

AMY -- Yes, you too?

BOB -- Yes.

AMY -- I like him. He's a good teacher.

BOB -- Yes.

BOY -- I don't see any hormones.

GIRL - You wouldn't.

BOY -- What do you meant by that?!

GIRL - Just listen.

BOB -- Amy?

AMY -- Yes, Bobby?

GIRL - Oh, no, here it comes.

BOB -- Would you like to go to a movie with me on Friday?

GIRL - (shouts) Think, girl, THINK!

AMY -- I'd love to, Bobby....

GIRL - (walks away in despair) ...Oh, no....

AMY -- ...but I don't date non-Christian boys anymore.

GIRL - (turns, smiles) Well, I'll be!

BOB -- That's okay, Amy. I'm a Christian now.

AMY -- You are?!

BOB -- Yes. I gave my life to Christ a couple of months ago.

GIRL - (pumps arm in victory, whispers) Yes!

BOY -- That shouldn't be any surprise to you. They only assign
guardian angels to Christians.

GIRL - I'm not surprised that he's a Christian. I'm surprised
that Amy would limit herself to Christian boys. (to Amy) Good
girl, Amy!

BOY -- I'm afraid you lost me.

GIRL - Big surprise.

BOY -- Hey, is that an insult?

GIRL - Amy used to date any boy who would ask her out, until she
got stung.

BOY -- What do you mean?

GIRL - Listen, she'll explain... (points to Amy)

AMY -- Bobby, I have to be perfectly honest with you. The reason
I will only date Christian boys from now on is because I found
out the hard way why the Bible says that Christians should not
be unequally yoked with unbelievers.

BOB -- I'm sorry, I'm a new Christian. I don't know what that
means.

AMY -- The picture in the Bible has to do with hitching up two
oxen who haven't pulled a plow together before. They end up
pulling in different directions or at different speeds. It just
doesn't work.

BOB -- When you talk about pulling in different directions,
you're not just talking about smoking and drinking, are you,
Amy?

AMY -- That too. But mostly about sex.

BOB -- I'm not going to kid you, Amy. I may be a new Christian,
but I'm not new to sex.

AMY -- You're not?

BOB -- No. I let myself be lured into sex, and now I'm sorry I
did.

GIRL - (turns, pumps arm in victory, whispers) Yes!

AMY -- You are? You're sorry?

BOB -- I'm still a new Christian and I haven't read that much of
the Bible yet. But, from what I have read, it's pretty clear
that the Lord's plan is for sex to be the glue that holds a
marriage together. You know, "the two shall become one flesh".
It was never meant for unmarried people.

AMY -- Oh, Bobby, you have no idea how glad I am that you said
that.

BOB -- Why?

AMY -- Because it makes it easier for me to tell you that I once
let myself be pressured into sex.

BOB -- Oh, I'm sorry. (turns away)

AMY -- Does that mean you're having second thoughts about going
on a date with me?

BOB -- (turns back) Oh no. Not at all. I just remember how
difficult it was for me.

AMY -- What do you mean?

BOB -- I mean, I know what it was like when it came time for the
two of you to break up. I mean, how do you break up with a
person after the two of you have done the most intimate thing
two people can do together? It's a killer.

AMY -- (sighs) Yeah.

BOY -- So, what are we doing here? It looks like they're doing
just fine without us.

GIRL - Shshshshshsh. They're about to make an important
decision.

BOB -- What could be more important than abstaining from sex?

GIRL - Shshshshshsh. (shouts) Alright, Amy. You know what you
have to do. Make the tough decision.

BOB -- Amy?
AMY -- Bobby?

BOTH -- Yes?

BOB -- You first.

AMY -- No, you go ahead.

BOB -- I was just going to say that maybe we can benefit from
our experience.

AMY -- I was just going to say the same thing. We know how we
went wrong.

BOB -- That right's. We know now how people get lured into sex.

AMY -- Are you talking about kissing?

BOB -- Yes.

AMY -- Me too.

BOB -- Kissing always gets my motor revved up with nowhere to
go....

AMY -- ...I know what you mean. It was almost impossible to say
no to sex while I was right in the heat of passion. I would feel
a lot more confident about abstaining from sex if you and I
agreed not to kiss for a long time....

BOB -- ...Maybe until after we get married. It would sure make
it easier to break up if things didn't work out, you know....
Not that I'm planning to break up with you already...

AMY -- I know. I agree.

BOB -- I'll bet you're a great kisser.

AMY -- You to.

(they lean in to kiss)

GIRL - (shouts) Hey, you guys! Stick to the plan!

BOTH - (pulling away) We should stick to the plan. (they rise
and cross to exit hand in hand)

BOB -- It'll be kind of relaxing not having to wonder "Will she
or won't she?"

AMY -- "Should I or shouldn't I?"

(they laugh as they exit)

GIRL - (follows) I love it when a plan comes together.

BOB -- (follows) Say, you know, you're pretty good looking. Do
angels ever do the dating thing?

GIRL - (to audience, points over shoulder at Boy) Hormones!

(both exit)

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