DAD      3'1m3f Father's Day (secular)

(scene: three chairs side-by-side facing audience DC)

AMY -- (enters crying, blotting eyes with tissue, crossing to 
chairs) My face is weak from crying so much.

MOM -- (enters crying, blotting eyes with tissue, crossing to 
chairs) Me too.

LIZ -- (follows, holding back the tears) I'm not crying.

AMY -- (sitting) Why can't I stop crying?

MOM -- (sitting) Because you loved your Dad. We're all going to 
miss him terribly.

LIZ -- (sitting) Daddy wouldn't want us sitting around crying. 
He would want us to remember the good times we had with him.

AMY -- Maybe talking about the good times will help me stop 

LIZ -- I'll always remember Sunday breakfasts.

MOM -- Eggs benedict.

AMY -- Bacon and sausage AND ham.

LIZ -- Waffles with too much syrup.

MOM -- He always called it the diet-buster.

LIZ -- Daddy's favorite three food groups: sugar, salt and fat.

AMY -- But he always said (imitating) "it doesn't hurt to 
splurge on breakfast once a week."

LIZ -- If he was here now, I'd make him breakfast with lots 
sugar, salt and fat.

MOM -- Me too.

AMY -- Daddy always had time to help me with my homework.

LIZ -- I don't care how busy he was, he'd push his own work 
aside as if his own work wasn't even important.

AMY -- But it was important. Did you see the numbers on those 
contracts he brought home?

LIZ -- $750,000.

AMY -- $1,200,000.

LIZ -- Even when Dad came home looking like he'd spent the day 
in a chain gang, when I asked him to shoot hoops with me, 
(chokes on her words) he always said YES. 

MOM -- (hands Liz a tissue, tearful) He always said "YES, as 
soon as I get my hug and kiss from your mother."

AMY -- He always slobbered all over you.

LIZ -- It was embarrassing.

MOM -- He never slobbered.

LIZ -- I'm glad he never made out with you like that in public.

AMY -- I hope my husband always hugs and kisses me like that 
when he comes home from the office.

LIZ -- Me too.

AMY -- (blotting eyes) He was a good Dad.

LIZ -- (blotting eyes) The best.

MOM -- (blotting eyes) He was a good husband too. He always took 
time out after you kids were in bed to just sit and talk with 
me. I'll miss that.

LIZ -- He always made me feel like I was a terrific athlete.

AMY -- And he always made me feel so pretty. Remember he used to 
come down to breakfast every morning and say, "Good morning my 

(all pocket their tissues when Dad appears)

DAD -- (enters in pajamas, bath robe and slippers, scratching 
self, crossing to C) Good morning, my lovelies.

(all stand) 

LIZ -- Good morning, Daddy.

AMY -- Good morning, Daddy.

MOM -- Good morning, Honey.

DAD -- I had the weirdest dream, last night. I dreamed I died 
and you were all talking about me. Speaking of dreaming, why did 
you let me sleep-in this morning?

ALL -- It's Father's day.

DAD -- Oh. That's right.

AMY -- We made you breakfast. (grabs his hand, pulls him to 

(all move to exit)

LIZ -- With your three favorite food groups, sugar, salt and 

MOM -- The diet-buster.

DAD -- We'll it doesn't hurt to splurge on breakfast once a 

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