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CONTEXT  4'?m3f Christianeze jargon, the Lord's name in vain

AMY -- (enters with Liz) Tell me again what I'm doing here.

LIZ -- I need you to translate for me.

AMY -- I told you, I don't speak any foreign languages.

LIZ -- You're a Christian, right?

AMY -- Yes. But what does that have to do with....

LIZ -- (turns away from Sue, speaks with loud whisper) Here she
comes.

SUE -- (enters, crosses casually, reading Bible)

AMY -- Who? Susan? She speaks English.

LIZ -- I know. But she uses this Christianeze jargon. I have no
idea what she's saying. (turns, smiles) Susan!

SUE -- Grace and peace to you from God our father and the Lord
Jesus Christ.

LIZ -- (turns to Amy, out of the side of her mouth) See what I
mean? What's with all the grace and peace talk?!

AMY -- That's her way of saying hello.

LIZ -- (turns, smiles) Well, hello. Thank you for coming.

SUE -- In all my prayers for you, I always pray with joy.

LIZ -- (turns to Amy, shrugs)

AMY -- She knows you're not a Christian and she knows you're
uncomfortable with religious talk and she knows you've asked her
here to ask a favor and she's hoping her religious talk will
irritate you and maybe you'll go bother somebody else.

LIZ -- You got all that from one sentence?!

AMY -- Most of translation is in the context.

LIZ -- (to Sue) Well, Susan, I'm sorry to impose on you, but I
was hoping to enlist your help in converting this vacant lot
(sweeps hand broadly toward audience) into a playground for the
kids of the neighborhood.

SUE -- Suffer the children to come unto me and forbid them not.

LIZ -- (turns to Amy, shrugs)

AMY -- She likes kids, but she doesn't want to lift a finger to
help you with your playground idea.

LIZ -- (to Sue) I really think this playground is long overdue
for this neighborhood. The children have to cross two busy
intersections to get to the closest playground.

SUE -- Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls
to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and
then turn and tear you to pieces. Do not be unequally yoked with
unbelievers.

LIZ -- (turns to Amy, shrugs)

AMY -- She doesn't like the idea of working with a
non-Christian.

LIZ -- (to Sue) You don't have to WORK with me. All I'm asking
is for you to give money to the project.

SUE -- For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil.
Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and
pierced themselves with many griefs.

LIZ -- (turns to Amy, shrugs)

AMY -- She has no intention of giving money to this playground.

LIZ -- (to Sue) This is a really worthy cause! These kids need a
safe place to play!

SUE -- Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and
faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their
distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

LIZ -- (turns to Amy, shrugs)

AMY -- She gave at the office.

LIZ -- She what?!

AMY -- She has no intention of giving money to you or to anyone
else.

LIZ -- (to Sue) Well, maybe you could make an appeal at your
church.

SUE -- Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by
prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to
God.

LIZ -- Don't tell me. She's going to pray about it.

AMY -- She won't give it another thought.

LIZ -- (to Sue) Well, listen, if you can think of any way that
we can make this playground a reality,...

SUE -- I must be about my Father's business. (points to exit)

LIZ -- (turns to Amy, shrugs)

AMY -- She's running out of scripture references, so she'd like
to end this conversation as quickly as possible.

LIZ -- Well, thanks for coming.

SUE -- (exiting) I'll remember you in my prayers.

LIZ -- (turns to Amy, shrugs)

AMY -- She would appreciate it if you didn't bother her again.

LIZ -- (exiting with Amy) Boy, you are really good at
translation.

AMY -- I've had a lot of practice. I go to church every Sunday.

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