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BOBSNEWS 5'4m?f Salvation: Bob's body reacts to an alter call

ANCHOR -- It's six o'clock and time for an update on the news
from Bob's body. I'm your news anchor, my name is Bob. Let's go
first to an update on Bob's brain. Here is our science editor.
Bob?

SCIENCE - Thanks, Bob. Earlier this evening, Bob's ears heard
the Gospel of Jesus Christ loud and clear. Bob has also heard a
clear invitation by the pastor to come forward and make a public
acknowledgement of his decision. All sound levels and light
levels are optimal for Bob to process the incoming data. Bob's
brain is now working at maximum capacity to calculate what the
Gospel means to Bob. Back to you, Bob.

ANCHOR -- Let's switch right away to Bob's legs and our action
reporter. Bob?

ACTION -- There is currently no activity in Bob's legs or feet,
Bob. Bob's backside seems to be glued to the pew. We'll update
you the moment we see any activity here in Bob's legs. Bob?

ANCHOR -- Thank you, Bob. Let's switch to our life style reporter
in Bob's heart. Bob?

LIFE STYLE - Thanks, Bob. Very clearly, the gospel message has
had an effect on Bob's heart. Surface measurements of Bob's
heart show that deep down inside of Bob's heart, he knows that
Jesus is God incarnate and that he should change his life style
to include the creator of the universe. But as we have reported
several times in the past, Bob's heart only gets one vote in the
democratic process of Bob's body. Back to you, Bob.

ANCHOR -- Thank you, Bob. We seem to be getting some activity
from Bob's head. Let's switch quickly to our science editor.
Bob?

SCIENCE -- Thanks, Bob. What Bob is looking at now is the altar
of the church. Bob is watching several other people in the
congregation go forward to publicly acknowledge their decision
to accept Jesus as their savior. Bob is watching the process
with great interest. Now, back to.... Oh, wait! Yes, indeed,
Bob. Bob definitely nodded his head just now, indicating that
Bob is favorably disposed toward salvation. Back to you, Bob.

ANCHOR -- Thanks, Bob. Let's see if there is any other motor
activity in Bob's body, as we check in with our action reporter
in Bob's legs. Bob?

ACTION -- Bob, if there has been a decision to make any kind of
commitment, it is not evident down here in Bob's legs. I'm at a
loss to explain why all systems in Bob's body are go for
salvation, but Bob is still sitting on the launch pad. Back to
you, Bob?

ANCHOR -- Well, Bob seems to be at odds with himself. He seems
to be favorably disposed toward salvation but he's not doing
anything about it. Let's get an update from Bob's heart and our
life style editor. Bob?

LIFE STYLE -- Thanks, Bob. Amazing as it sounds, Bob's heart,
which was the first part of his body to encourage Bob's
conversion, is now the source of his hesitation. Bob's new
life style, though it would include eternal life, would also
carry a rather weighty downside. Bob now has to admit that his
present life style is somehow lacking before he can accept the
new life in Christ. Back to you, Bob.

ANCHOR -- Thank you, Bob. Let's switch to Bob's brain and our
science editor. Bob?

SCIENCE -- Thanks, Bob. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a real
cliff-hanger going here. Bob's eyes and ears have just received
messages from the pastor at the front of the church that time is
running out for this altar call. Bob's brain is working at near
overload at this point. He seems to be doing an unusually large
number of calculations for a decision that has only two answers,
yes or no. Back to you, Bob.

ANCHOR -- Thank you, Bob. We switch you immediately back to Bob's
heart for a news flash. Here's our life style reporter. Bob?

LIFE STYLE -- Bob, we now know that the quandry in Bob's heart
was much less about admitting that his present life style was
lacking, than about how much he will have to give up in order to
be saved. Fortunately, the Pastor's last invitation to the altar
included an explanation that God would take Bob just as he is
now. Bob's heart is decidedly lighter now than just a moment
ago. Back to you, Bob.

ANCHOR -- Thank you, Bob. Let's switch immediately to our action
reporter in Bob's legs for an update. Bob?

ACTION -- Thanks, Bob. And, yes, ACTION is the byword here.
Bob's bottom is now off the pew and Bob's legs are walking... no
they're running down the isle toward the altar. Back to you Bob.

ANCHOR -- And there you have it. A moment in Bob's life and one
that Bob will never forget. Bob has just crossed over from death
to life. That's our update from Bob's body for tonight. Good
night.


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