BACK

HELL     4'2m?f Creation, Heaven, Hell, salvation, good, evil

(light cue: dim to 50%)

JESUS -- (enters, faces audience, holds hands high and wide)

ANGEL -- (enters opposite paging through thick document) Oh, no!
This can't be right. Lord! Please don't start creation yet!

JESUS -- Let there be ...

ANGEL -- Excuse me, Lord.

JESUS -- (drops arms) Yes, what is it?

ANGEL -- I was looking at these (points to document)
specifications for the design of the universe. Let's see, how do
I put this?

JESUS -- Make it quick. I'm on a tight schedule for the next
fifteen billion years.

ANGEL -- Well, to put it bluntly, I think you might just have a
public relations problem on your hands here.

JESUS -- Everything I do is perfect. How could I have a public
relations problem?

ANGEL -- Well, it's not about the universe itself.

JESUS -- Good. Then, come back and talk to me about it when I'm
through with the universe. (raises and extends arms) Let there
be...

ANGEL -- Wait!

JESUS -- (drops arms) Look. I'm a little busy here. What....

ANGEL -- I'm afraid it might be to late in fifteen billion
years.

JESUS -- My public relations problem.

ANGEL -- Yes.

JESUS -- Alright, I'm listening.

ANGEL -- It's about this other place. You call it HELL.

JESUS -- What about HELL?

ANGEL -- Well, for one thing, it's... it's eternal.

JESUS -- Yes. That was the idea. What's wrong with eternal?

ANGEL -- Well, once you make it, it lasts FOREVER.

JESUS -- That's the idea.

ANGEL -- According to your specification, the people you send
there will never see you again, ever.

JESUS -- Do you see a problem with that?

ANGEL -- Well, yes. According to the specification, your
prophets will describe Hell as a place of torment, of
unquenchable fire, and of eternal darkness.

JESUS -- You're wondering how Hell can have darkness at the same
time there are flames in the area?

ANGEL -- Among other things.

JESUS -- Well, obviously, those descriptions are just
figurative. I wanted people to know that Hell is not a very
pleasant place.

ANGEL -- I guess that leads me to my main objection. Why would
you bother to create such an unpleasant place?!

JESUS -- Because I wanted to give my creatures a choice.

ANGEL -- A choice?

JESUS -- Yes. They can't choose to be in my presence unless they 
are allowed to have some other option.

ANGEL -- And the option is Hell.

JESUS -- Yes. Think about the most irritating angel you know in
Heaven.

ANGEL -- That would be Abigail. I don't know how she ended up in
the choir. But she can't carry a tune to save her soul.

JESUS -- What if you had to listen to Abigail's singing all the
time every day for all eternity?

ANGEL -- Fortunately, I won't have to. According to your
specification (points to document) I will be assigned as a
messenger to your people on Earth when it's finished.

JESUS -- What if I reassigned you to listen to Abigail for all
eternity?

ANGEL -- Oh, please don't do that! Her voice is like fingernails
on a chalk board!

JESUS -- I won't. But, that will give you an idea of what it
would be like for people who choose evil. If I forced them to be
in my presence for all eternity, it would be worse than forcing
them to listen to Abigail's screeching for all eternity.

ANGEL -- So, Hell is merely your way of giving evil people what
they want?

JESUS -- I don't see how I could have designed the universe
without it.

ANGEL -- (turns, strolls) Oh. I guess you're right. (reads)

JESUS -- (raises and extends arms) Let there be....

ANGEL -- (turns) Speaking of choices. Are you really going to
allow your creatures a choice between good and evil? (points)

JESUS -- How would you like to be reassigned to the choir, right
next to Abigail?

ANGEL -- (exiting) On second thought, it's not all that urgent.

JESUS -- Let there be light.

(light cue: lights up full)

JESUS -- (exiting opposite) Oh, that's good!

2013 Bob Snook. Conditions for use:
Do not sell any part of this script, even if you rewrite it.
Pay no royalties, even if you make money from performances.
You may reproduce and distribute this script freely,
but all copies must contain this copyright statement.
http://www.bobsnook.org  email: bob@bobsnook.org

BACK