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HEAL     3'3m0f Peter and John heal a blind beggar

JOHN --- (enters, limping) My feet are killing me.

PETER -- (enters, rubbing abdomen) This was a dumb idea, John.

JOHN --- (sits on rock DC, rubs feet) What do you mean, Peter?

PETER -- Not taking any food with us. I'm hungry! (looks around 
rock) There's not even any wild berries around here.

JOHN --- The Lord told us not to take any money or food with us. 
Consider it a test of your faith.

PETER -- Look who's talking. We came out here to heal people and 
you're pulling up lame.

JOHN --- Very funny. When do we get to the next town?

PETER -- We must be getting close. (points offstage) There's 
blind man up ahead. Blind people usually don't wander too far 
from home.

JOHN --- A blind man? (stands) Oh, good. I'll heal him. (moves 
toward exit)

PETER -- (grabs John's arms) No, I'll heal him.

JOHN --- (pushes Peter back) Oh, Contrare, mon frare. This one 
is definitely for me.

PETER -- You healed the last blind man.

JOHN --- Yes, but I'm better at healing blind people than you.

PETER -- Oh, look at the specialized healing professional. I 
could heal this blind guy with one hand tied behind my back.

JOHN --- Well, mister modest, I could heal him with both hands 
behind my back.

(thunder)

PETER -- What was that?

JOHN --- You mean, 'WHO was that?'

PETER -- Oh, oh.

JOHN --- Is that you, Lord?

GOD ---- (Deep base voiceover, with echos) I am.

PETER -- You are what?

JOHN --- Shshshsh, Peter, that's his name. Remember the burning 
bush?

PETER -- I am. Oh, yeah! (waves at the sky) So, ah, what's 
happenin', God?

GOD ---- Who will heal this blind man?

PETER & JOHN -- I will.

PETER -- Excuse me, but it's my turn.

JOHN --- Excuse me, but I have more experience at healing blind 
people.

(thunder)

PETER -- Oh, oh.

JOHN --- You're absolutely right, Lord, I humble myself before 
you. Peter, YOU go ahead and heal him.

PETER -- I am the servant of all and I will let YOU heal this 
one, John.

JOHN --- No, I insist. YOU heal him.

PETER -- No, John, YOU can heal him.

JOHN --- Don't tell me what to do. You're not my boss.

PETER -- You're not the boss either.

(thunder)

PETER -- Oh, oh.

JOHN --- Sorry, Lord.

GOD ---- Who will to heal this blind man?

PETER -- We can't agree on anything today, Lord. Maybe YOU 
should decide for us.

(thunder)

JOHN --- You're making him mad, Peter. Maybe we're supposed to 
know who will heal the blind man.

PETER -- Could you give us a hint, Lord?

(thunder)

PETER -- I guess that's a NO.

JOHN --- Maybe neither one of will heal him.

PETER -- If we don't, who will?

GOD ---- I am.

PETER -- That's not very good grammar, Lord. What you want to 
say is 'I WILL'.

(thunder)

PETER -- Or not.

JOHN --- Can't you see what he's telling us, Peter?

PETER -- Yes, he's telling us he doesn't like a little 
criticism.

JOHN --- No, you and I think that just because we do the laying 
on of hands, we do the healing. But the healing comes from God.

PETER -- Yeah, but I'm the one who has the faith.

(thunder)

PETER -- But then, of course, the faith comes from you also, 
right, Lord?

JOHN --- Now, that we know who really does the healing, let's 
get to work. (exits)

PETER -- (hands on hips) Who died and made you boss?

(Thunder)

PETER -- (cringes, scampers to exit) You're right, let's get to 
work.


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