BACK

ROOF     6'2m0f They lowered a paralyzed man through the roof

(panting, shuffling, struggling)

MANNY -- Hang in there, Harvey, we're almost there. We're almost 
there, aren't we, Larry?

LARRY -- Yes, we're almost there, Manny.

MANNY -- See, Harvey? We're almost there. 

LARRY -- I didn't think Harvey was this heavy.

MANNY -- Well, we've carried him all the way across town, Larry. 
Anybody would seem heavy after you carry him across town. You 
probably hurt Harvey's feelings, Larry. Don't you think you 
should apologize to him.

LARRY -- Manny, Harvey, is unconscious, he's been unconscious 
for three years. How can I hurt his feelings if he can't hear a 
word I say?

MANNY -- It's a shame about the accident, isn't it, Larry?

LARRY -- Manny, you say that every day, like it just happened 
yesterday.

MANNY -- Well, I feel guilty. It was my fault. I'm so accident 
prone. 

LARRY -- Try not to think about it, Manny. Try to think about 
what life will be like after Jesus heals Harvey.

MANNY -- Yeah, that'll be exciting won't it? I swear, if Jesus 
heals Harvey, I will never throw a horseshoe over my shoulder 
for good luck again. Poor Harvey.

LARRY -- Here we are. That's the house, there.

(low rumbling crowd noise)

MANNY -- Oh, man! I knew we'd be too late. Look. There are so 
many people, they're standing in the doorway and watching 
through the windows. Oh, man! Now, Harvey will NEVER be healed.

LARRY -- Don't be such a pessemist, Manny. We'll just excuse 
ourselves and work our way in the door. 

MANNY -- You lead the way, Larry.

LARRY -- Okay, here we go. Excuse me, please. Excuse me. Hey, can 
you let us by? Well, that didn't work.

MANNY -- Let me try, Larry. Excuse me, please, Excuse me. Can I 
get by here.

LARRY -- Watch out Manny, the meeting is starting and they're 
closing the door. Manny! Harvey's hand is going to get caught in 
the...

(loud crunch)

door.

MANNY -- Oh, gee, Harvey, I did it again. I'm such a klutz. I'm 
sorry, Harvey, I'm so sorry.

LARRY -- Save it, Manny. He can't hear you. Let's take him 
around back. Maybe there's a back door.

MANNY -- Good idea, Larry, let's try the back door. Hey, Harvey, 
we're going to try to get you in through the back door. After 
Jesus is through with his sermon, he usually heals people. I'm 
sure he can heal you, Harvey. Geez, Larry, look at that hand. 
It's all swollen. 

LARRY -- Don't worry, Manny, I'm sure that the guy who created 
the universe can heal a swollen hand.

MANNY -- I'm so sorry, Harv.

LARRY -- Save it, Manny. He can't hear you.

MANNY -- Oh, yeah.

LARRY -- Well, the back door is jammed up too, Manny. Let's 
take him up this ladder to the roof. These flat roofed houses 
usually have a stairway inside leading up to the roof.

MANNY -- Oh, yeah, good idea, Larry.

LARRY -- We'll have to tie him onto the stretcher and then one 
of us can pull him up from the roof, while the other pushes him 
up the ladder.

MANNY -- Okay, Larry, you lead the away. Hey, Harvey, we're 
going to lift you up to the roof and then bring you down the 
stairway. It's just a matter of time before Jesus can heal you, 
Harvey, boy. Oh, man! Look at that hand! It's all black and 
blue. Geez, Harv, I'm so sorry.

LARRY -- (afar) Okay, I'm up. I'll pull, you push... and be sure 
to keep Harvey's head away from the rungs of the ladder.

(thud)

MANNY -- Oh, man! I did it again. I'm so sorry, Harv.

LARRY -- (afar) Save it, he can't hear you. Just keep pushing. 
And keep his head away from the...

(thud, thud)

... ladder. Larry!

MANNY -- Oh, Man! I'm sorry, Harv. Oh, man! 

LARRY -- (afar) Keep pushing and be careful.

MANNY -- I am such a klutz.

(thud)

Oh, man! Larry, I'm not sure this was such a good idea.

LARRY -- (afar) Keep pushing, Manny. We're almost there.

MANNY -- Okay, Larry. Sorry, Harv.

LARRY -- (near) Here we are. Now, let's see about the 
stairway... Just our luck. No stairway.

MANNY -- Oh, man! Now what are we going to do?

LARRY -- We'll pull up a couple of the roof boards here and 
lower Harvey by the rope through the roof.

(creaking lumber)

MANNY -- Good idea, Larry. 

(creaking lumber)

Did you hear that, Harvey? We're going to lower you through a 
hole in the... Oh man!

LARRY -- What's the matter?

MANNY -- Look at the size of the lumps on Harvey's head. Oh man! 
Harvey, I am so sorry!

LARRY -- Save it, Manny,...

MANNY -- I know he can't hear me. But when he wakes up he'll 
probably never talk to me again.

(creaking lumber)

LARRY -- There! That hole should be big enough for Harvey.

MANNY -- Oh, yeah, I can see Jesus down there. He's already 
started healing people, Larry. We should hurry. Or Jesus will be 
gone before Harvey gets down there.

LARRY -- Alright, I'll guide him through the hole, you hold the 
rope. 

MANNY -- Hurry, Larry. Hurry!

LARRY -- Okay,... I'll... just... guide... his... feet... 
first... and then...

MANNY -- Hurry! Larry!

LARRY -- Take up the slack!

MANNY -- What slack?

LARRY -- Don't you have the rope?

MANNY -- I thought you had the...

(whoosh, whistle, thud)

...rope. Oh, man! I did it again. (shouts) I'm sorry, Harvey!

LARRY -- It's okay, Manny. He landed right in front of Jesus.

MANNY -- Look, Larry, look! Jesus healed him! Harvey is awake!

LARRY -- Isn't that amazing!

MANNY -- Jesus just said some words and Harvey woke up!

LARRY -- Praise God.

MANNY -- (shouts) Hey, Harvey, we're up here. Hi. He's not 
smiling, Larry.

LARRY -- Manny, watch out for that loose....

(whoosh, whistle, thud)

lumber.

MANNY -- (shouts) Sorry, Harvey.

LARRY -- It's okay, Jesus just healed all of his lumps and his 
hand too.

MANNY -- Praise God, ha, Lare?

LARRY -- Praise God. (beat) Well, let's hurry down and thank 
Jesus before he leaves.

MANNY -- Yeah, let's hurry down. Oh, wait a minute. Hey, Larry, 
I forgot to tell you I moved the....

LARRY -- (fall away scream) Aaaaah! 

(Thud)

MANNY -- ...ladder. Oh, Man! I did it again (shouts) Are you 
okay, Lare?

LARRY -- (afar) That's it! I've had it. I'm out of here.

MANNY -- (shouts) Where are you going, Larry? Jesus is in the 
house here. Larry? (normal voice) Oh, man! I did it again. Oh, 
Man! (beat) Oh, well, I'll try to catch up with him later. I'd 
better go down and try to apologize to Harvey. It was a shame 
about the ladder. It was right here.... (fall away scream) 
Wooooo!

(thud)

(moans) Wow. It's a good thing something stopped my fall. 
Harvey? Oh, Harvey, I didn't see you standing there, I swear. 
Oh, Harvey, I am so sorry. Harvey? Harvey! Oh, man!


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